Surprises in Life

Do you ever get that feeling about something and think "no, it can't be" then just shove it out of your mind?

Then you start noticing little things that bring it back to your mind?

So, then you start obsessing about it and get paranoid about it?

Then you are analyzing every little thing, very paranoid and  you just have to find out even though you know it CAN'T be true?

This happened to me the week before Christmas

So I had to find out - I even emailed Russ and called to let him know I that I just had to find out - he wanted me to wait till he got home - I said no way!

This was the results of what I was obsessing and paranoid about

I didn't even have to wait 3 minutes - it was positive right away 

This how I felt - I thought I was going to faint or throw-up or both would of been appropriate

I didn't know which to do first - so I just sat on the toilet and cried - really cried 

Then I called Russ - he said he was on his way home (such a great husband)

but I told him I would be fine till he got home

and I realized that evening we were having company - my inlaws for Christmas

So - being the strong, 42 year old woman - I finally pulled it together

 I cried for two weeks

My husband is very understanding - I told him it may be months

Now that we are over the initial shock

and we've had a sonogram (thanks goodness it isn't twins)

I can say - I think I am excited about this

I don't know what God is thinking

but he does know what is best for us and our family

Is this His way of trying to me to trust him more with my life?

We will appreciate and love this special gift of life were are given

I know everything will work out

but really God - I'm 42 yrs old

Due Date:  August 10th

and yes. . . this is why I haven't done any blogging